By Candace Stretch, Manager of The Cridge Supportive Housing & Family Services

The Cridge Respite & Respitality Services are all about caring for the caregiver. These two companion programs help stressed-out, worn-out parents, who are raising children with special needs or a mental health diagnosis, take a meaningful break. For the past several years, two amazing women- Mimi Davis & Gyneth Turner- have worked together to provide Respite & Respitality Services to families with a wonderful blend of compassion and innovation.

Twenty years ago, Mimi’s heart of compassion for caregivers led her to create The Cridge Respitality Program. She reached out to local business owners and shared stories of burnt-out caregivers in our community with them. Moved by Mimi’s deep care for parents, hotel after hotel, restaurant after restaurant, and business after business donated their services to families. Through her love, empathy and support, Mimi left an indelible impression on the parents she served, and on the Respite and Respitality Services that she believed in so deeply.

Seven years ago, the Respite & Respitality services encountered a beam of light and energy in the form of Gyneth Turner! Gyneth’s experience in the hospitality industry and her passion for using technology to help families were invaluable. She brought new ideas about how we could maximize our resources. Through this innovation, Respite & Respitality Services were able to expand to serve double the number of parents!

The unique combination of compassion and innovation that we found in these wonderful staff members has transformed Respite & Respitality. Mimi entered her well-deserved retirement in December, and Gyneth will embark on a new career path in October. We wish them each the very, very best. We have been so blessed to have this Dream Team serving our families, and we value the legacy of compassion and innovation that will continue to shape these vital programs!

Learn more about The Cridge Respite and Respitality Services here.

By Elisabeth Bomford, School-Age Care/Sunfun Program

“Idiot!”

I was just in the middle of asking which child I was going to be paired with for inclusion for the summer, and before my colleague could answer, my new little buddy made himself known to me!  I walked over and introduced myself, but, like the child, he had just been yelling at, my name didn’t matter. “Idiot!” he screamed back at me.

We talked it out, got a ball returned, and apologized for our language. I say “we” and “our” because immediately it was a team effort.  It had to be, I had to become his best friend, and he quickly became mine. The rest of the day was fine, transitions were difficult, but they always are on the first day of camp.

The next day started more smoothly. On our out-trip to Fort Rodd Hill, we had a great bus ride, sat with friends, ‘played’ guitar, and even took pictures of the scenery. But then we had to eat lunch. To him, that didn’t mean eating lunch; it meant ending play, which was, at the very least, unacceptable. “Stop,” he screamed at me, while I sat cross-legged with his lunch in front of me.

“What am I doing that’s frustrating you?” I asked.

“You’re blocking my hits, and I just want to punch you!”

I almost laughed. It was such a strange transition, from being upset about us needing to eat and sit in the shade, to being upset that I wouldn’t let him hit me.

“I can’t let you hit me, it hurts, but when you’re done, we can eat and start playing again.”

For a while, that became our script. He would run away, and I would stand in his path. He would knock over my block tower; I would ask him to build it back up with me. He would hit a ukulele against the ground, and I would stop singing with him. Give and take, right?

Within a couple of weeks though, there was a shift.

“Can we go play, just you and me?”

“I need to go for a walk.”

“Can we build a tower together?”

Finally, we were becoming a duo. He ate parts of his lunch, and I’d let him crunch my eggshells. He’d narrate a message for mom, I’d write it on a picture he drew. He joined the group art projects, sat with more friends, played more games.

We were both lucky. SunFun 2018 was hot, smoky, and long, but we were both beyond blessed to have the support we needed. The teams at Cridge and Queen Alexandra were full of resources to try, and sometimes discard, but we had fun mixing it up and finding a pattern that worked for us.

Finally, our last week came. I was constantly on the verge of tears, remembering the beginning of our summer and how much had happened since then. Just as I was about to ask another leader to give me a break so I could rinse my teary face, my buddy came up to me. He held out a pool noodle, and I hesitated to grab it. What would it be today? A horse? A sword? A walking stick?

“Hold it to your ear,” he told me. Oh, a telephone.

“What are you going to do? I need you to be gentle with my ears, or they can hurt.”

At this point, he rarely acted out for a reaction. Sometimes though, we did need to be reminded that even playing can hurt someone if they’re not ready.”

“I won’t scream.” He looked up at me, more seriously than I’ve ever been looked at before. “I promise.”

I made a show of raising the ‘phone’ to my ear, and, although I trusted him, got ready to pull it away just in case. He whispered something, but I couldn’t hear it.

“I’m sorry, can you repeat that? It was a teeny bit too quiet for me.”

He looked at me as if I’d asked him to run up Mount Doug. With a sigh, he raised the other end of the pool noodle to his mouth.

“I love you, idiot.”

 

To learn more about SunFun, click here.

Tom came home, fuming. His mom could see his anger as soon as he stepped off the school bus. It took some prodding and time to get it out of him, but eventually, his emotions got the better of him, and his frustration exploded out of him. Tom LOVES grapes. And he was so mad that his grade 4 classmates were chucking grapes at each other during lunch. Tom knew that grapes are expensive because his mom rarely bought them – for Tom, grapes were a huge treat. So seeing his classmates throw them around and squish them underfoot just made him angry. Why could some kids afford to waste grapes when his family couldn’t even afford to buy them? Life was not fair, and Tom was mad.

Sometimes it is the smallest things that make a child aware that they are not as “equal” as their peers – the food in their lunch box, the second-hand clothing, or perhaps not being able to go on a field trip because of the cost. These small things can become very big issues when a child is identified by their peers as being “poor” and are treated differently or bullied as a result, or it can result in the child losing their self-confidence and considering themselves to be less than their peers or even being incapable of success. Small things can become life-changing events for children facing challenges.

At The Cridge Centre Childcare program, we work hard to make sure that all children are loved and supported to reach their full potential. We go out of our way to make sure that children facing barriers are not excluded or defined by their challenge. For example, the breakfast program is for all the kids, not just those who don’t get a healthy breakfast at home. Everyone should get to enjoy grapes!

Giving kids a healthy and secure start to life is one step to growing a stronger community, one precious life at a time. We need your support to make sure that all our children have equal opportunities to grow, learn and thrive. Please give generously to help kids like Tom!

To support children like Tom click donate.

Hello, my name is Brenda, and I have volunteered to write a short article about The Cridge Nursery, which happens to be a part of my own story. This is my third time working here over the last 32 years, and it is interesting to reflect upon what is different and what has remained the same. I am also thinking about the stages and events of one’s life and all the programs and opportunities available here. A lot of development has been happening in the field of early childhood education. Also, parenting styles have changed over the last three decades. The reasons for choosing to work here are both personal and very much about being a part of something bigger than yourself mostly though it comes back to being about the people.

What is different between the 1980s and now? The biggest thing would be maternity leaves increasing from six months to a year. It was tricky at times to juggle the needs of infants and crawlers and walkers all in the same playroom, but I still had the energy to attend evening classes for my Infant/Toddler Diploma with “Joy Joy” (Joy Smith). The nursery program expanded from a classroom in the main building to a renovated townhouse which now houses programs for families. One of the first babies there was Paula’s West-Patrick’s son Matthew. Paula was also an infant-toddler care provider at the time, and now these many years later is the Manager of Children’s Services for The Cridge Centre.

I got married the same month as Janine Davies in 1991 (who has worked for The Cridge since 1988 herself) and moved on to new adventures including parenthood. As my son and daughter reached school age, I was ready to return first as the kitchen/laundry/lunch relief assistant and eventually as the Preschool teacher. After watching the new childcare building go up, it was exciting to move into a beautiful new classroom. My former Wiseways Preschool boss Mimi Davis was in the boardroom next door with the Respitality program. As a bus driver, there were many field trips for preschool and daycare, and occasional school drop-offs and pickups to help out. When I subbed during summers, my children attended a few weeks of High 5’s with Angela Brunwald and Marianne Jacques or SunFun with Sarah Smith and crew. My working helped us buy a house for my fortieth birthday, which led to a decade of daycare in my home.

Now my family daycare babies are in school, and my twenty-somethings are happier living in an adult-focused home. After taking a 6-month break to deal with some middle age health issues, friends at The Cridge encouraged me to try relief work. I am settling in nicely, not only am I caring for former children’s children, but even some coworkers were children formerly in my care! I look around the daycare and main office and other programs today and see many familiar faces. I am loving the freedom of subbing in a busy multicultural, multiage, diversely socio-economic organization. It’s a great place to hang out for a few years and work on my future Grandma skills.

To learn more about The Cridge Childcare Services click here.

By Marlene Goley, Manager of The Cridge Transition House and Outreach Services

The impact of having a designated Young Parent Outreach Program space where Nicole can gather with her young moms and their children has been incredible. Moms drop by to go through the clothing donations. On Thursdays, the Music Group is a big draw and moms linger afterward to gather up food picked up from the Food Share Program. Nicole and Moms enjoy having more space to meet and connect and to get applications done. Moms can come and “settle.” Space has even impacted our youngest clients. A mom dropped by with her 3-year-old little girl to go through donations and pick up some food. The 3-year-old ran into the new Young Parent Outreach Program space, threw out her arms and said, “This space is so wonderful!” How awesome to have a space to welcome them all!