- Safety Planning
- IPV ResourcesDomestic Violence BC Helpline: 1 800 563 0808Domestic Violence BC Website:http://www.domesticviolencebc.ca/ Resources In times of change and transition, women and children can greatly benefit from access to resources in their community. Some of the agencies that we frequently refer our clients to are: BC Families in Transition provides support to families who have experienced divorce, separation and family re-organization. B.C./ Yukon Society of Transition Houses provides information about transition houses located throughout British Columbia and the Yukon. The Ending Violence Association of BC (EVA BC) offers materials to support women seeking safety and their service providers. The Government of British Columbia’s Stopping the Violence website offers resources and contact information about the counselling and support services available to women in B.C. Information Justice Denied- a powerful poem by a former resident of The Cridge Transition House for Women
- What is IPV?
- Do you have a brain injury?
- CTHW Volunteer ProgramInterested in volunteering at Cridge Transition House for Women? Volunteers are important at Cridge Transition House for Women. We count on our volunteers to help with all the things that need to be done to support the women and children in the house. Volunteers do things like: drive women to appointments, help prepare dinner, pick up and organize donations, fill the house with delicious baking smells, take care of children, fuel up the house vehicles, pick up groceries, keep brochures organized, replenish supplies in the linen closet, water the garden, and too many more things than we can list! We couldn’t do what we do without our fabulous volunteers. If you would like to learn more about volunteering at CridgeTransition House for Women, call Anita at 250-479-3963.
Areas of Service
Select from the links below to visit our various programs
Intimate Partner Violence (IPV) is any behaviour within an intimate relationship that causes physical, psychological or sexual harm to those in the relationship, including acts of physical aggression, sexual coercion, psychological abuse and controlling behaviours.
- Physical Abuse – hitting, slapping, hair pulling, sexual assault, physical restraint/ holding in place, locking out of the house, refusal to help if injured/ sick, refusing to allow someone to leave (i.e., blocking the door, putting your body in the way), etc.
- Property Abuse – destroying shared property, or someone else’s property
- Emotional Abuse – threats of harm or violence, yelling, screaming, name-calling, put-downs, and controlling behaviours, such as:
- Needing to know where someone is at all times
- Limiting/ preventing access to friends and family
- Controlling what someone eats
- Sexual Abuse – rape, unwanted sexual contact/touching, ignoring expressions of discomfort or unease, incest, sexual abuse of minors, anti-gendered sexual jokes and demeaning comments. Can be difficult to recognize when this happens in a relationship.
- Financial Abuse – controlling finances and expenses, limiting access to one’s money, taking away pay cheques, spending money that is not their own without permission, putting large joint purchases only in their name (car purchases, apartment/housing agreement, etc.), refusal to pay child support.
- Coercive control – a strategic form of ongoing oppression and terrorism used to instill fear. The abuser will use tactics, such as limiting access to money or monitoring all communication, as a controlling effort. Here are some signs of coercive control:
- isolation from one’s support systems (moving away from family, restricting access to friends, monitoring phone and social media use, fabricating lies about others, convincing one that their family hates them etc
- monitoring one’s activity throughout the day (installing surveillance apps/ placing GPS tracking devices without one’s consent, using cameras/recording devices at home, including private areas like bedroom/bathroom)
- denying one freedom/autonomy (not allowing to go to school or work, restricting access to transportation, controlling every move, taking one’s phone away, changing passwords/deleting contact info)
- gaslighting (convincing one that they are wrong/overthinking, manipulating and guilting to get their way and convince one that they are wrong)
- name-calling and put-downs
- limiting one’s access to money (establishing a strict budget that barely covers essentials, limiting access to banking accounts, hiding financial resources, not allowing one to have a credit card, rigorously monitoring one’s spending)
- turning one’s children against them
- controlling aspects of one’s health and body (how much one sleeps, eats, or spends time in the bathroom; control medication intake, limiting access to physician or nurse, controlling one’s reproductive health and rights
- making jealous accusations
- regulating one’s sexual relationship (demanding sex a certain amount of times a day/week, regulating activities one performs, demanding to take explicit photos/videos; refusing to wear a protection/get tested for STIs
- threatening one’s children/pets (including violent comments, threats to call social services, threats of kidnapping etc)
What can you do?
- What can you do if you suspect you are in an abusive situation?
2. How can you support someone in an abusive situation?
- Help them to establish a safety plan/escape plan
- Remind them that it is not their fault
- Research local resources and transition houses and have the contact numbers available if they choose to call to get help
- Abuse can be isolating, encourage them to talk about their situation with trusted individuals if they can – ensure that this is done over the phone or in person, leaving texts or email threads can pose a risk if the abuser finds out
- Speak about the abuse without judgement, it is always their choice whether or not they want to leave the abuser
- Do not confront the abuser – this may cause more harm to the person experiencing the abuse or yourself
- If you believe a child is in harm’s way, you have a duty to report to the Ministry of Child and Family Development.
The Latest From Our Blog
The Cridge Centre for the Family
1307 Hillside Avenue,
Victoria, B.C. Canada V8T 0A2